Thirteen...things
1. I've faked being in the Christmas spirit. The truth was revealed when I tried to write our annual Christmas letter and I was just stumped. I came up with something rather bland and unoriginal... my usual letters are full of magic and feeling. This one? Not so much. It was a surprise to me - I'd faked the Christmas feeling so well that I even fooled myself.
2. It may have something to do with being gone from the house every single night since Thanksgiving. No time for snuggling with children and baking cookies... in fact, my kids have decorated gingerbread cookies without me. I missed it.
3. They also have watched all the Christmas movies without me - Miracle on 34th (in black and white!), Rudolph, Frosty, The Christmas Story (you'll shoot your eye out kid!) I've missed ALL of it.
4. The most loving feeling I've felt came when I listened to the song, "Don't Take Down The Mistletoe" and it made me cry because I love my husband so much.
5. I've really got to find a way to ENJOY the holiday - while it isn't my favorite (Thanksgiving is...) I typically really really enjoy Christmas. But not so much this year I guess...
6. We have a screensaver on our regular computer. It's currently showing a rotating slideshow of all of our photos we've downloaded ever since we got a digital camera. This makes me feel a truly unsettling combinations of feelings: both sad - very very sad, and joyful.
7. Why sad? Sad at wanting the life we used to lead in our old house before we moved cross country the first time.
8. Sad at all the memories we now hold only in our hearts: the marks of growth on the wall between the dining room and the mudroom, the exact perfect yellow of paint in the main living room, the wonderfully comfy couch we'd gotten at a yard sale, the perfect kitchen remodel and the exact perfect layout of the house.
9. Joy too... joy at seeing Bear, age 4, opening birthday presents, and Buddy, age 6, wearing a goofy hat from Grampa Manny, and Chick - looking so young and innocent at 13 going to a first dance.
10. I don't know how to find the warmth and peace and LOVE that I usually feel at Christmas time. Any suggestions?
11. Maybe I need to reevaluate how much "work" is necessary for our income to meet our needs.
12. My husband made both a Christmas music CD (a yearly creation) and a DVD (a years worth of our photos of the kids)... too beautiful to describe to you, but only to tell you that man, I LOVE my husband.
13. What makes you feel Christmasy?
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11 comments:
My thoughts? It's not Chrisrmas yet. I don't see how we can expect to feel Christmasy for six weeks. On Christmas Eve check in with yourself again. I'll bet you'll feel more a part of it.
I'm sorry you're not in the Christmas spirit, but truth be told...I haven't been for the last few years. It's just not the same anymore.
Happy TT!
I’m up!
*hugs*
Sounds like you are in one of those life's little ruts... time passes and sometimes it's hard to really enjoy those moments. We feel sad because they are going by so quickly.
I feel Christmasy... I don't know why. I just feel happier and sillier. My kids tend to behave more... my husband tends to be more lovey dovey with me... everyone calls me cause it's my birthday month. I love snow and snowmen and I get all excited about Santa and it just feel energized. :)
I hope you get to feeling more Christmasy soon! Have a lovely thursday.
I just go out and drive around, looking at the Christmas lights. That makes me smile.
We're not into the Christmas spirit either. However, I do find that looking at some of the pictures my parents had taken of us as kids on Christmas morning is helping me find the magic and spirit again.
Oh, I'm sad you're so glum this year. Can you get out and enjoy some sunshine somehow? That always helps.
The new memories will come. Let them in; you'll be surprised at how wonderful it all can be.
{{Hugs}}
I know how your feeling because I'm not in the Christmas Spirit either. I'll probably feel better on Christmas Eve after i've been to a carol service.
I think the problem is that it starts too early and by next week everyone is fed up.
Sometimes it's hard to get in the Christmas spirit. And right now, my husband hasn't gotten my Christmas things from the attic, and my house isn't decorated. It doesn't seem to bother him, but it does me!
Come visit my TT
Wow. I can so relate to you on these points.
I've been "phoning it in" this year too.
I don't want to add to your plight, but I don't have any answers for you. I'm up and down too, looking at old pictures affects me the same way.
Here's to wishing you the best this year. I just spend time every day listing in my mind ways I am blessed, then I thank God for all of them. It gets me through, if not very much more into the Christmas spirit.
I'll feel Christmassy when this gosh darned Nutcracker is finished on Saturday night. Then and only then will I be able to relax and enjoy my kids.
xo
LBC
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