Miss Bear

Bear deserves a post all on her own.

She's the 3rd child, the baby. Some would say she is spoiled. I might agree with them, but I also know that a lot of the time, she gets the short end since she is the 3rd, the last, the one I'm sometimes too tired for. She's the one that gets dragged out on all the errands cuz she can't be left alone. She's the one that gets the "here, go watch a movie on mommy's bed" instead of "sure I'll play a game with you" because I'm wiped out and old and slow and tired. She's also the one who has no real chores though.

Let me tell you about my bear. I've always known she was really cute. When she was two, she was all long dark ringlets and big hazel eyes and tiny pug nose. She had a mouse-voice and called her brother "WahWah" cuz she couldn't say his name. She loved to snuggle and cuddle and squeeze in close. She was whiny and challenging. When she hit pre-school, we started hearing from other people. "oh, today I saw Bear and her smile just lit up the room!" "Today Bear came up and hugged me out of the blue!" "Today I said Hi to Bear and she smiled like she'd been waiting just for me all day!" My Bear. She is a bright light!

Her shiny-ness from pre-school continued and now she is still a bright and positive kid. She is alive... she is a storyteller, a budding playright, a musician/singer/songwriter. She is a basket weaver and an imagination dweller. She gives and gives and gives. She gives her love, her forgiveness, her joy. She willingly gives her money to charity, to her siblings, to her friends. She gives her heart to all she does. She notices things to buy for other people. She makes pictures for them, cards and drawings. She loves expansively. She loves in a physical way, always hugging and kissing and holding hands. She leans on you, lays on you, rubs you... oh does she love to have her feet rubbed!

Bear has challenges. Her pragmatic speech is fractured. She has strong tendencies toward Non-verbal learning disorder. She struggles to get her thoughts out in a way that others can comprehend. She has a lot to say... just that it doesn't always make sense to people. There are some people in our family who are annoyed by Bear. The don't understand her, and at her age they feel they should. The are annoyed by her, bothered by her, irritated and grouchy with her. They shoo her away, they make unkind side remarks about her to me, or I can see it in their faces as they dismiss her. She can become the scapegoat for things because of her communication challenges. These are adults who treat her this way. It's just been recently that these things are becoming apparent, that these ways she is treated are in the spotlight.

My heart breaks. My anger rushes and throbs. My indignation is on fire.

On Thanksgiving day, I saw as my father and my step father (who were both total jerks as parents!) talked with joy and pleasure of Bears brightness and joy. They chuckled adoringly over her incessent talking. They laughed aloud at her story telling antics and her outgoing gregarious nature. This Thanksgiving, I was Thankful that there ARE people who can see her in a different light, in a better light, in the RIGHT light.

God, I know you have plans for Bear. Plans to prosper her, not to harm her. She is first YOUR child, and secondly mine. I promise to do all I can to grow her under your light. Please dear father, keep her safe. Protect her from her enemies (and from mine). Keep her heart strong and peaceful and let her always be "just her". Please send more people in her life that can appreciate the gifts you've bestowed on her, people to lift her up a little and keep her spirit shining when things get hard. Thank you for the gift of her in my life. Amen.